I’m not really sure where this post is going or what my point is, but I felt I just need to write. There’s been a lot of talk flying around the internet at the moment saying that personal blogging is dead. That’s a little hard to digest for me seeing as my blog is almost entirely personal. It’s got me thinking though, about why I write, why I started writing and where I’m headed? The peas rattling around in my head have given some some very restless nights of late.
I started writing my blog before I really even knew what blog was, as a way of communicating to my friends and family in the UK when we moved to Sydney. It was just a series of random stories really, about how we were doing and what I was feeling. After a while I started to grow a readership and my writing style changed. I started writing more about what I thought people would like to read, than what I actually wanted to write about.
I’m in a constant struggle about how much of myself and my family I should put on the internet and how much I should keep to myself. All my stories are honest and real, but there is definitely more of a ‘vanilla’ tone to them now than there used to be. I’ve some how found myself with a front row seat on the fence, not really knowing which side of it I want to be on and quite frankly, I think I’ve become a bit boring.
So where am I going with this blog, what do I want from it and what do my readers want? The more I think about it, the more I realise that the struggle with my blog content directly mirrors that battle I have with myself, about the direction my life is headed in. For the past four years I’ve been a stay at home mum, and although I have battled with the loneliness and boredom of it on many an occasion, I have actually come to love it. Weirdly enough, this is where my conflict lies. I feel that I have an obligation to be more than this. I shouldn’t be happy with it, yet I am. I’m happier than I’ve ever been. Does that mean I’ve sold out? Have I lost my passion and drive in life?
For a long time I’ve been ashamed of saying what I am and what I do, so I’ve always resorted to saying ‘what I used to do’. Hinting that I’m kind of treading water right now, until I ‘become something again’. The thing is, I have no idea what that is? Well I thought I didn’t, but actually it’s been staring me in the face all this time. If I’m the happiest I’ve ever been then why am I treading water? What’s wrong with being a full time mum and a blogger? I couldn’t stop writing even if I wanted to because I love it, pure and simple. I may not be the best writer out there but writing makes me happy and I’m going to take that as a win.
So is personal blogging dead? Maybe it is maybe it, maybe it isn’t but who cares really. All I know is that I’m going to keep going because I like it. Hopeful I can make some money from all my hard work, but either way the stories in my head still need to be written and I get great satisfaction from writing them. As for the vanilla, I still need to work on that. If I can open up in public about being a complete nutcase during my days with post natal depression then I think I can start to be a bit more open about the boring as shit days of being a stay at home mum as well all the moments that make my heart want to burst (as well as pretty much everything in between).
So at long last, I think I am going to jump off the fence. You may want to follow along with me and I will love you for that, or you may want to unsubscribe now, and I’ll love you for that too. Either way I’m going to write (and cook, because that’s something I do now).
Do you think my blog has become a bit vanilla – don’t be shy, I can take it?
Do you think personal blogging is dead?
What are your thoughts on earning money from a blog?